Friends At Work: Blessing or a Curse

I am in abit of a dilemma about friendships at work especially in the high stress environment of nursing.  I have had close friends at work which have really helped in those I-just-cant-do-this-one-more-day moments who have kept me sane, given me a shoulder to cry on and laugh with.  I have enjoyed the camaraderie that these relationships bring, the feeling of support and that somebody has my back.  But when those friendships teeter a little being at work with someone who knows so much information about you can make you feel vulnerable, it can be hard to deal with those moody days when you are not getting on so well, and that got-my-back can sometimes morph into someone is going to stab me in the back!!! And we all know that in nursing there are some events that happen at work that quickly bring the best and the worst out in us!

My very first nursing job as a Staff Nurse on a demanding Neurology Ward in Oxford, England I met a wonderful lady called Carol who became my mentor before I even knew what the word mentor meant!!  This was a deep friendship that still sustains today and I would not have survived my first couple of years of nursing without her.

Then I have had friends outside of work who are also nurses and there is immediately an instant connection, nurses can always chat.  Early on I met an amazing girl called Karen, we became very very close, worked in the same hospital but never really with each other, but had enough connection that we both supported each other, especially when we had our first babies.  Again, another friendship that was as necessary as oxygen at that time in my life.

Then there were the new jobs where I undoubtedly tried too hard to connect in an effort to fit in.  The danger with close friendships at work is sometimes you can divulge too much information about your personal life too soon and when that friendship starts to "crumble" it becomes toxic and your hostile friend can now use all that "stuff" against you.

As a seasoned nurse I now advise my nursing students to be professional, always always have your colleagues back, you never know when you want them to have yours!  If seeing colleagues outside of work and getting close is what you want/need go ahead, but be aware there can be pitfalls, Big ones!  If you are not that kind of person, its really fine to have good communication at work, for people to know just enough about you and then leave the job at work, colleagues and all when you leave.

I would be interested to know what you guys think.  What is your experience of friends at work?  The good the bad and the ugly.